You’ll Always Be His Mama!

photoBy Deb DeArmond

That beautiful bundle I’m holding is my new grandson, Kohen. He is six-weeks old today and already making himself heard in this world. Just ask his parents about the sanctity of sleep. They have a whole new appreciation for it these days.

They live halfway across the country, but they are exactly where I believe God wants them to be. So the airline points will fulfill a new purpose in my life: hold that boy!

We celebrated his Mama, my daughter-in-law, Heather, at a baby shower before his arrival. Several guests were asked to share a few words of encouragement or advice for the new mom-to-be.

Many talked about their own experiences as moms and what their children had taught them. Some reassured her that she would again, at some point in her life, sleep undisturbed through the night. Her own mom talked about Heather as a baby and what a blessing she knew this addition would be to Heather’s life and that of my son.

As the hostess I spoke last, just before the prayer offered over our luncheon. I looked at my sweet daughter-in-love, whose place has been secured in my heart for more than 12 years.

“Heather, I know something about boys,” I began. “They are so incredibly special. Be forewarned—they are loud and track in dirt and they can sometimes be smelly. But you’re going to love it – and they will love having a mom who loves sports and all things outdoors.”

“The first moment you hold your child, you’ll wonder how you ever drew a breath before he graced the planet. You will be captivated by a love you didn’t know could exist. He will look into your eyes as if no one else is of any interest at all. You will be besotted, and he will own you completely.”

“You’ve been given a lot of advice today. Great advice. It’s my privilege to add one more thought, a recommendation to help you as you raise up your sweet son.” I paused, swallowing hard. “As much as he loves you, and as fervently as you will love him, please remember this one thing: God never intended for you to be the most important woman in his life.” Several guests looked at me curiously.

“The good news is that for now, and for many years to come, you get to be the stand in for that role with no competition. But just as God chose you to fill that spot in my son’s life, Kohen will someday find the woman of God’s dreams to fill it in his. Knowing that now, will make that day joyful for everyone.”

Heather looked teary. My other two DILs were too. It’s the reality of every boy-mama. We are tasked with raising our sons so that someday some woman will take him off our hands and into her heart and life. It’s God’s plan; it’s how He designed it to be.

When it’s done well, your son will remain fully in your heart and life as well. It’s one of the few times God smiles when two women love the same man. And don’t ever forget, you will always be his mama.

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5 thoughts on “You’ll Always Be His Mama!

  1. So excited for you and Ron with that new grandson!
    Grandkids are wonderful! Thanks for your blogs – I love them!
    Lori Koll

  2. Love this post. I’m going to ask my daughter to read it even though her son is only 2 years old. Having a good perspective throughout his entire life will make big changes easier.

  3. Beautiful baby boy Kohen… Wonderful blog and so true as well. I think about this often as I look my “little man” almost eye-to-eye now. He’s about 5’9″ to my 5’11”. I still recall holding him and he just covered my forearm (wasn’t that just a couple of years ago?) Wow, you have a wonderful family Deb and you all are truly blessed! I know you will continue to enjoy all your wonderful little new blessings as the days/weeks/months/years go by. Just don’t blink, right?